More to the story

The rest of the story of the 10th of May is that my friend and I spent the day working on a quilt for our host family when we go to the Czech Republic in 2 months.  She loved Tom, too, so it was good to remember and laugh and cry.  It feels so good to hear other people talk about him--telling what they loved about him, funny memories or things he said.

On my way to my friend's house I realized something powerful--for several months now I have been so afraid of these days in May.  I tried to find ways to avoid them by leaving town or if I stayed in town then I felt an enormous pressure (from myself) to make the days important and special--just didn't know quite how to do that.  Then when it all turned around and I experienced so much peace I found myself rushing toward the 9th and the 10th of May looking forward to what they would hold and the sweet memories of Tom, feeling again so loved and cherished by him.  He's more alive than I am!  I miss him terribly but I KNOW where he is--he's safe, he's healthy, he's full of life for all eternity!  AND he's gotten to meet Jesus face to face!  AND we'll see each other again some day.  My fear is gone!  I embrace this peace that passes all understanding and want to keep it forever.

At the end of the day I enjoyed dinner out at the Woodinville Cafe--a favorite of Tom's--with two close couple friends.  On Wednesday the staff from my church took me out to lunch to celebrate Tom.  My, he was loved!

Yesterday I spent the day in bed with a stomach bug.  Thankful that it was short lived.

Today was a new day--borrowed a friend's pickup truck and drove to deJung's on Avondale to pick up dirt for my two new raised vegetable beds.  Made two trips for a total of 2 yards of soil.  Me, my shovel and wheelbarrow got the job done.  Tomorrow I plan to go for one more load of compost this time--they say it's lighter!  When I turned on the radio in the truck it was turned to a country western station.  I enjoyed listening to lyrics like, "if I get some money I'll buy a Mercury or two" and this one had me laughing out loud--"I don't do windows, don't even ask but I'm real good at drinking beer."  I really am a farm girl at heart (raised on a chicken farm) and it felt good driving a truck, moving dirt and getting beds ready to plant.

Life is totally different without Tom.  He's had such a profound influence on my life--I'll be forever thankful.  One thing he never did was sit around and mope--he lived life to the fullest and I plan to follow his example.  Man, I love that man!