Today

Today I said goodbye to our RV.  Tom and I had so many wonderful trips in it--the memories of being in it always make me smile (except today they are making my eyes full of tears).  Tom's favorite thing to say each time we took off in it was, "I can't believe we have an RV!"  He loved it.  Now it's on its way to Texas with my brother behind the wheel.  It makes me happy to know who has it and to think how much they will enjoy it--a new chapter.

Today I remembered that 4 years ago our grandson Harper, just 5 days old, left us for heaven.  I still picture his great-grandmother greeting him, snuggling him down and rocking him with her "so-so" song.  His twin brother, Maximus, talks of him often.

Toay I feel that it is "count-down" until the 10th.

I heard a new song yesterday.  Don't know all the lyrics--must find out how to find them--but some of the lines said, "it's now what I would choose, but it's what You use."  I also heard the end of an interview with a woman who had experienced much pain in her life but was using that pain as an inspiration for reaching out to women who were caught in sex trafficking.  I truly believe she is on the right track.  It would be easy to focus on the pain BUT turning the grief into serving others feels so much better.  Whether it's spending time with grandchildren, creating new vegetable gardens, getting ready to go on a mission to Russian speaking people in the Czech Republic or quilting--it's all helping.  The hugs from my family and friends continue to keep me grounded and connected. 

Wish the words would come easier.  It's harder than ever to put my thoughts down but it seems important that I try.  Is it?  Does it matter?